Let Her Go
by ginnifermorrisons
Summary: "Nothing is a fluke on this island. My island." When Wendy Darling shows up in Neverland, Peter Pan is going to have to adjust. For the better? That's the only thing he's ever been unsure of. Darling Pan's backstory.
1. Chapter 1

**a/n: i'm obsessed with this pairing. And Robbie Kay. and so I decided to write their backstory. I hope you enjoy, and reviews/comments/feedback are always appreciated! **

**chapter 1**

It's dark, and it's cold, and it's wet.

Very different from her house with its warm, inviting wooden floors, soft carpets, and cozy blankets on the beds.

She shivers; her nightgown does not do a great job of warming her. If she'd _known _ that she would be whisked away in the dead of night, sure she'd have layered up. But that's the problem. She _didn't_ know.

And she's still not sure where she is, anyway-some cave in the wilderness? Which makes absolutely no sense, because the last thing she'd been doing was arguing with her younger brothers about some fairy-tale book and whether they believed it or not, in front of their big window, and suddenly everything went dark, and before she knew it, she was in the cave. In the middle of nowhere, as far as she could tell.

She manages to stand up, dazed, and automatically pushes a lock of her hair behind her ear. Somehow it's still in a smooth ringlet.

What just _happened_?

She carefully starts walking towards the light source at the end of the cave. Maybe this is all a bad dream. Maybe she'll wake up and see her brothers and caring, loving mother and father and-

"Well, well, well," comes a slow, male drawl. Suddenly it doesn't seem like a dream anymore. Especially not when the voice turns out to be an actual person. A teenage boy. He has blonde hair and a smirk. "Pan will be _so_ glad to see you."

"Lost _boys_ for a reason, Felix," Pan says, rolling his eyes. "Tell me again why my shadow just happened to _choose _a girl? For the first time?"

"We didn't direct it to. It picked her up," pipes up one of the newer initiatives to the Lost Boys. Felix glances over at him and at the other boys who are gathered around Pan at their campsite, noting the truth to his words but deciding to keep quiet.

"I thought I was talking to Felix," Pan snaps, eyes glossing over as he turns back around to face Felix. "Is this true?"

"Yes."

"What's so _special_ about her, then?" he demands. It's interesting; Felix has never seen him confused before. He tries to play it off, but here it's obvious-quite obvious-that he's as lost as the rest of them are. No pun intended.

"Not sure," Felix coughs, looking anywhere but Pan.

Another Lost Boy speaks up. "Probably just a fluke-"

Pan whips around to face him, his cape-like jacket flying around with him. "Nothing is a fluke on this island. _My _island." He narrows his icy blue eyes and faces Felix again. "Bring her to me. I'm sure this _darling _little girl will tell us everything."

Wendy opens her eyes to a wide-open night sky full of stars.

She swallows, trying not to think about how similar this view is to the one from her own house, when the silence around her is interrupted.

"_This _is the girl?" asks a spiteful voice. "Not very impressive."

There are a few titters from others. How many people are around her? She sits up, trying to adjust to the darkness that lacks the bright light from the stars above.

There. Right in front of her stands the boy who first picked her up, and must have drugged her, or something of that sort, because him talking about someone-Pan?-and how "glad" he'd be to see her.

She inhales shallowly and looks around more, but the rest is darkness. "Where am I?" she asks, trying to sound brave, or at the very least, not scared, but her voice comes out small.

"You really don't know, do you?" asks the teenage boy. "How can you possibly-?"

"Quiet, Felix."

Wendy spins around at the sound of another voice, one that speaks with shorter syllables and a richer accent. Out of the shadows steps yet another boy-shorter than Felix, and with a different air about him. His eyes wander over her, and all she can do is stare back at him.

Eventually his icy blue eyes flick back over to Felix. "And she's the only one?" He sounds like he couldn't care less.

"Yes. I-"

"You can go," says the boy carelessly. "Thank you, Felix."

Felix bows his head and turns away from them; as he walks away Wendy can hear more footsteps following behind him, but she still can't see anyone else.

She blinks as hard as she can-maybe this is still just a dream. A very, very bad dream. But when she opens her eyes, she's still there. There's soil underneath her feet instead of a warm hardwood floor. And there are blue eyes even closer to her now.

"Who are you?" she asks, her voice this time thankfully coming out stronger. "Who are you and what is this place and why-"

"So many questions," says the boy playfully, stepping back again and beginning to pace around. He pulls out a pointy stick from a few others that hang in a pouch from his back and runs his eyes up and down its length. Raising an eyebrow, he begins to speak again. "Did I forget to introduce myself? I'm Peter." He smiles smugly and widens his eyes. "Peter Pan."

Wendy narrows her eyebrows. "I'm Wendy Darling," she offers.

Pan half-smiles. "It's nice to meet you," he replies, looking over his shoulder at her and raising his eyebrows again. "Wendy," he repeats, trying the name out on his lips.


	2. Chapter 2

**a/n: thank you all so much for all the reviews and follows/favorites, they really mean a lot! This story is so, so interesting to write, especially when I've totally fallen in love with the characters (and Robbie Kay, oops). i hope you enjoy this chapter! **

* * *

**chapter 2**

He paces a lot.

It's something Wendy only notices after a few days in Neverland, which is what all the "Lost Boys" call it, except she has no idea what that means. Peter Pan paces and Wendy doesn't know what to make of it.

He speaks sharply, acts quickly, and is witty when he needs to be, but his smiles last for less than seconds and she doesn't know why.

He keeps her in their camp, which she's grateful for-she has no idea who any of these people are or _where_ she even is, but the presence of people around her somehow makes her feel more comfortable. Especially when the island is so menacing.

"Are you expecting to _get _something out of staring at me?" he demands one day as all of the other Lost Boys are climbing trees and ropes and competing for who has the sharpest spear. He stops pacing and sits down on a fallen tree branch.

"I-" She's at a loss for words. It's the first time they've interacted since their first meeting, and she still has no idea how she's supposed to act in front of him, treat him. So many things are a mystery here. "I have nothing else to do," she answers truthfully.

He cocks an eyebrow up. "Neverland is that boring for you, is it?"

"I don't even know what this place is, I-I don't even know who you are."

In a millisecond he's right next to her, sitting on the log. "I thought we've been over this." He pauses and grins. "I _am_ Peter Pan."

Wendy sighs. "Yes, I know."

His grin falters but he's back up in a second. "So what's your question? Or why, then, are you wasting my time?" He turns his steely glance to hers and she averts her eyes.

It's silent for a while, and then he's right in front of her, crouching so that they're at eye level. She can feel his breath on her. "So I'll ask you again, _Wendy Darling_, how exactly did you come to be in Neverland?"

This time she can't tear her eyes away. "I don't know."

He raises his eyebrows, purses his lips, and backs away from her, shrugging. "This seems to be a pattern, doesn't it?" Drawing out an arrow from the pack on his back and studying its length, he stretches it out on a bow. "And tell me, do you think-" he fires the arrow straight into a tree- "you'll _ever_ know the answer?"

She's silent again. His questions are impossible, and so is he.

"I just want to go home," Wendy dares, the words slipping off her tongue before she can stuff them back in. She clears her throat. "Peter, can I go back home?"

"No one gets off this island without my permission," he states casually, glancing sideways at her. "And, as it seems, you _don't _have my permission."

She bites her lip and holds back tears that are threatening to slip out. "I don't-I don't understand."

"You wouldn't," he says, beginning to pace again.

Wendy glances down at her nightgown. It's so out of place, white and frilly and made by her mother. There don't seem to be any mothers in Neverland. Or any girls, besides her.

"Well?" Pan asks loudly. "What are you still doing here?"

"What-I-?"

"This conversation is over," he states, like it's obvious. "I have matters to attend to, and your presence is no longer needed."

"I'm not your _property,_" Wendy spits out without meaning to. "You can't just-"

He's suddenly right next to her, radiating heat and sending a glare that threatens to penetrate her skin. "Let me make myself very clear, _Wendy_ _Darling,_" Peter utters in a soft tone while still enunciating every syllable.

She can feel her heart beat faster again.

"This is _my_ island. And _I_ call the shots." He backs away, but holds the eye contact, smirking.

"Felix," he calls, and the other Lost Boy shows up. "Take her back."

Felix nods and grabs her by the arm with a rough grip.

"Careful," says Pan, chuckling, "don't want to _harm_ Wendy here, or dirty her pretty dress."

As she's marched away, she can see him start to pace again.

* * *

He gives her new clothes the day after.

Of course, it's not actually _him_ that gives them to her, rather a random Lost Boy, but she's sure that it can only be Pan who sent him.

Because after all, he's the one who calls the shots. Clearly.

"You look nice," Felix drawls as she steps out from behind a large tree, white dress in hand. She now dons black, looser pants with a soft, faded green tunic. "Blend in more now."

She keeps her eyes downcast as she heads back towards her tiny living area, which includes mostly twigs and branches.

She has no idea where Pan sleeps, or if he even does, for that matter.

Lost Boys line the way as she walks, and she squeezes her eyes shut and keeps walking hurriedly. She can feel their eyes on her.

"Glad to see you changed."

There he is again, leaning against the tree opposite from her. "You fit in more now."

_I don't want to fit in here. I want to be home. _

"Don't want to talk?" he asks, chuckling. "You're going to have to eventually. You _are _the first girl in Neverland. Doesn't that make you feel _special_."

She keeps her head down. Maybe if she stops talking to anyone, he'll realize that this is all some sort of mistake and she can be sent home. Finally.

"You haven't eaten anything," he says, louder this time. "Don't want to have you die here."

She dares to glance up at him as she crouches on the ground, folding her white gown into a neat pile. "I don't want anything."

"Well, that's a shame," he says carelessly. He waves his hand at the ground vaguely and eggs on a sizzling pan appear. "If you're not going to eat, then I will, I suppose."

Wendy narrows her eyes at him. He shrugs and takes another bite. "Your choice." The food smells good. The last time she ate was back at home. Hot cocoa with cinnamon sprinkled over the top, made late at night by her mother.

She bites her lip and glances back at the Lost Boys, who seem to have lost interest. They hold a gaze for a few seconds, but she can't figure out anything from his piercing blue eyes. Pan raises an eyebrow and holds the egg out, offering it to her.

She reaches out and takes it.

* * *

**a/n: i love reviews; they keep me motivated to keep writing! :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**a/n: thank you so much for all the positive feedback I've gotten on this story! It means so much, especially the reviews ;) so keep those coming if you like it! think lovely thoughts about robbie kay, which i've definitely been doing, and I hope you all enjoy this chapter! **

* * *

She can smell him wherever she goes; the musky scent of trees, fresh air, and smoke from all the nightly bonfires, something that's inherently _boyish _but has a manly aspect to it as well. Even down by one of the small lakes where she goes to wash her hair and body the best she can without the fancy body washes and shampoos that she's used to. Even where she sleeps, which doesn't even make sense. But then again, Peter Pan is not just in Neverland, he _is_ Neverland, and his presence pervades everywhere all the time. She's sure she can smell him on her clothing.

* * *

On the fifth day after Wendy arrives, Felix asks what everyone has been thinking but has been too afraid to ask.

"Maybe the girl is...what you've been looking for," he mutters, as he and Pan sit on a opposite logs both facing a small fire they've started. Pan pauses from sharpening his swords. "I don't remember asking your opinion," he snaps quickly.

They sit in silence for a few more moments. "You did say it wasn't a fluke, you know," Felix replies, dragging the toothpick that's in his mouth across to the other side of his lips. "What other use could you have for a _girl_?"

"I need the heart of the _truest believer_, how could it be this little _darling _girl?" Pan spits. "It looks as though all she believes in is rainbows and flowers."

Felix chuckles lowly.

"However, she _should_ be questioned," Pan continues casually. "Measure of protection."

"I'll do it?"

"No," Pan says, smirking. "I will."

* * *

It's late at night when he comes to see her, and she should be asleep anyway, but Wendy's found that it's impossible to sleep in Neverland at all.

"Wake up," he demands, standing over her. She sits up, supporting herself on the backs of her hands. "I wasn't sleeping," she persists. Her eyes widen as she begins to think. "Are you...are you letting me go?"

His eyes narrow. She shrinks back.

"Not yet, Wendy," he says, his icy eyes glittering in the the darkness that surrounds them. "But that doesn't mean we can't have a nice, civil conversation." He holds out a hand to her, raising an eyebrow and waiting for a response.

"I'm not going anywhere with you."

He chuckles lowly, glancing to the side. "Have it your way." He squats on the ground and sits, cross-legged, across from her. "We'll do this here."

"What do you want?" she asks, crossing her arms over her chest, fully aware of her vulnerability to him in this moment.

"I've just been _thinking_, Wendy," he begins casually, earnestly. She squints. "Before you came to this island-my island-what exactly were you _doing_?"

She pauses, glaring into his eyes. "Why should I tell you?"

He chuckles once again, smirking. Licking his lips, he stares straight at her. "This is the easy option. There are other...ways, if you'd prefer. The Lost Boys hardly ever get any...entertainment around here." He cocks an eyebrow. "So. Care to elaborate?"

Wendy, sensing defeat, lowers her eyes. She thinks about what she had been doing before she had been whisked away, just like that.

She remembers her brothers. And her bedroom, with her frilly blankets and curtains and soft rug and yellow walls. And her fairy-tale books, all lined up in her bookshelf. And her big window.

She struggles to hold back her tears, but a lone one slips out of her eye. _Stupid girl, how childlike! And in front of this monster-don't cry. Grow up. Don't cry. _

Wendy doesn't look at Pan. "I was talking to my brothers. John, and Michael. About some-some book. A fairy tale; mother used to read those to us. They thought it was stupid, but I-I didn't." She sweeps her finger over her cheek, collecting the tear, and dares to look up again.

He's staring intently at her, his icy eyes narrowed, his head tilted to the side, looking like a child who's trying to understand a new concept. Peter Pan is completely still.

They hold the gaze for a few moments longer. She inhales sharply and draws back, and this seems to click something in his brain. He bites his lip and raises his eyebrows, looking anywhere but her now. "Interesting."

And just like that, Peter Pan is gone.

* * *

She doesn't see him for the rest of the day, and that is _fine, _because she doesn't need him to feel _safe_, because Peter Pan is quite possibly the biggest threat she's ever faced, and he _should_ scare her.

There is no bonfire that night because he does not show up, and she's just starting to begin getting hungry and wondering where her next meal will come from, and even if she _will _have a next meal, and what if there is no next meal for her, because maybe she's said something wrong, and Pan will...he'll...

Or maybe he'll let her go.

She's pondering this as a Lost Boy, younger than most, sidles up to her, shyly holding out a plate to her with an omelette on it.

"Thank you," she says gratefully, picking it up with her fingers and tearing it in half. She frowns as the boy sits there, trying not to be obvious while staring, but completely failing. "Do you not have any food?" she asks politely, because her mother taught her to be benevolent.

The Lost Boy shakes his head no and she nods. "It's all right. Here, take this half." Wendy holds out half of it to him, and he accepts it, rushing his "thank yous" as he tears into it hungrily.

The two of them sit there, eating the perfectly done omelette. Wendy realizes as she looks around at all the other young boys and teenagers that no one else is eating. "Do you _all _not have anything to eat?" she asks, curious.

He shakes his head no, offering a sad little half-smile. "Then why do _I _have something?" she asks.

The Lost Boy shrugs. "Pan says you're his guest."

"Is that where you got this?"

"Well, from Felix. And he got it from Pan." He chuckles lightly, like it's obvious. "Who else?"

"Oh," says Wendy, biting her lip. Who else, indeed.


	4. Chapter 4

**a/n: don't worry, i have not given up on this story, nor do I plan to! :)**

**ALSO. because I am completely pissed about what happened in the last episode (my post about why is on my blog, killiancharmings, post/67327584378/would-appreciate-it-if-you-would- stop-criticizing), I am completely disregarding Peter Pan's backstory that they revealed last week. instead...i'm just going to stay in my little peter pan headcanon bubble forever, and that's where this story will be too. **

**so, just a recap: in this story, peter pan is NOT rumple's dad. so...I hope you enjoy this chapter!**

* * *

"Wake up."

It's him. Of course it is. She can tell by his scent and by the feel of his breath on her shoulder blades. He's the only one who ever bothers to come over to where she sleeps.

She turns over to face him, rolling her eyes, and he smirks. "Right, of course. How could I forget? You're the girl that never sleeps."

"What's going on?"

"Target practice," Pan replies, quickly glancing back at the Lost Boys who are playing with their wooden swords behind him. At his words everyone stops what they're doing and puts down their weapons.

Wendy can feel herself getting hot. "Target...practice?"

"Yes, quite a useful skill in Neverland," Pan says, the ghost of a laugh on his lips. He extends his hand to pull her up, and she grabs it, trying to shake the dirt off of herself as she stands up. She still doesn't feel like herself in Pan's clothes.

"Felix," Pan enunciates clearly, gesturing for his second-in-command to stand next to him. "Why don't we show Wendy here how we shoot?"

Felix grins, placing an apple that seems to come out of nowhere on his head and backing up. Pan steps back and cleanly shoots it off the top of Felix's head with his bow and arrow.

"Do you want to try?" he questions her, and Wendy can't tell if his tone is mock polite on purpose. She steps back a little, shaking her head. "No, I-"

Pan chuckles. "Wasn't really a question, you see, Wendy. You're going to shoot."

She swallows thickly, knowing that it's for her own good to go along with what he says. She doesn't exactly want to know what happens if she doesn't.

The Lost Boys are still all crowded around the three of them-her, Pan, and Felix, and she can feel her heart thumping wildly. If she accidentally shoots him, or, even worse, some other innocent Lost Boy-

The thought enters her mind of turning the arrow on Pan, but it's out as soon as it comes in. For some reason she can't allow that to stay a possibility.

With Pan dead, she has no idea what would happen to her in Neverland. He's the only one who's talked to her, gave her new clothes, _fed_ her...

He hands her the bow and arrow, and she tries to figure out what he's communicating behind his icy eyes, but Peter Pan is a guarded person, and she never knows what he's thinking.

Wendy attempts to hoist the arrow into place, but she's obviously doing it wrong, because she can hear titters from her audience. She dares a quick glance at Pan to see what he thinks, and he's merely staring at her, waiting for her to go on.

"I don't-I don't know how," she admits, willing herself not to cry _again_.

He smirks and tilts his head to the right, mocking her. "Here."

In a flash he's next to her, behind her. He reaches out, tugging her hand so that it's extending and holding the bow out as far as her arm can go. Then he reaches for her other arm. Her heart beats faster. Peter Pan radiates heat.

Wendy can feel his chest on her back and side as he wraps his fingers around her small hand that's clutching the arrow back at her chest. "_Pull_," he mutters, and tugs her hand back with his. She holds her breath for the second where they're both completely static together.

And then he lets her go.

The arrow goes flying over Felix's head and into the apple, pinning it neatly into the tree directly behind him. Wendy lets out a shaky breath.

"Thank you," she manages softly. Pan's lips quirk up for a second. "Just target practice," he replies, walking over to the tree and yanking the arrow out of the tree and into the pack that hangs loosely on his side.

Wendy wonders if she'll ever shoot an arrow again.

* * *

She grows to feel some sort of companionship, at the very least camaraderie, with the other Lost Boys. A lot of them are younger than her, and even the ones that are older seem to have some sort of respect for her. She likes it.

She often finds herself looking over at them playing-whether it's something childish like hide and seek or something above their level like sword fighting-and wishing that she could join in. But she is not a Lost Boy and she is not a Lost Girl, she is _the_ Lost Girl with no true place in Neverland and she cannot join in.

Until one grey afternoon when Peter Pan is nowhere to be found, which isn't _that_ strange, but she feels even more bored and fidgety than usual when he's not around, and the Lost Boy that served her dinner that night asks if she wants to play with them.

Wendy tugs on her hair-down and messy, as usual-and considers it, then feels herself nodding without really thinking about it. She does want to play with them.

"What are we playing?" she asks as she makes her way into the clearing where everyone else is.

"Hide and seek," says one of the Lost Boys excitedly. "It's my favorite, Wendy."

Wendy half-smiles. They know her name. Even though she doesn't know his.

It takes only a few minutes before she's running through the trees, barely missing uprooted branches and plants, so fast she feels almost as she's _flying_, because she has to find a good hiding spot. She feels free.

Yet she's obviously not very good at it-or maybe it's just because the Lost Boys have been here for decades and have probably figured out all the good hiding spots already, but for some reason they're still not tired of playing-because she gets found the first few times in under five minutes.

But she laughs and nods and swats away the Lost Boys that tease her playfully, that look at her like she's one of _them_ now, because she's _playing_ with them, and so she must be one of them, right?

Concealed in a tall tree, Peter Pan watches her smile.

* * *

**a/n: reviews make me smile, they really do. also, they keep me motivated to keep writing. :))**


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